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Alexis looks at an envelope.

And the winner for best podcast in the Television, Film, and Entertainment category is…. not this one.

Hello folks, welcome back to Creek of the week?  Month?  Decade?  Time has lost all meaning, and reality is but a dew drop rolling down a leaf, soon to drop from the tip and plummet to the earth, only to be absorbed into the soil and forgotten.  As I sit, canary in a cage though I may be, and lavish in all the comforts that a 21st century existence allows a man of modest means, I can’t help but wonder, is there more?  Something outside my prison of Television, Film, and animated games that flash their mind-numbing electric pulses into my retinas, down my optic nerves, and straight to the pleasure center of my shriveled mind, keeping me silent, and docile, and sated for the moment.  Once, I knew the touch of other human beings.  Once I heard voices, not pre recorded in Dolby 5.1 Digital Surround sound ™, but actual human voices made by human lungs blowing air over human vocal chords.  Those times are lost, however.  Now, there are only my electronic friends inside the box.  David, Alexis, Johnny, Moira.  They keep me company.  They keep me safe.  And this week they have a visit from a rich relative. I hope your prisons find you safe and healthy as well.  Should this missive reach you, spare a thought for a fellow prisoner, wasting away, dreaming of open air, human interaction, and the Applebees 2 for $22 value menu featuring the Bourbon Street Chicken and Shrimp for a limited time only at your neighborhood Applebees.

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