Episode 240 – Little Sister
Hello folks, welcome back to Creek of the week? Month? Decade? Time has lost all meaning, and reality is but a dew drop rolling down a leaf, soon to drop from the tip and plummet to the earth, only to be absorbed into the soil and forgotten. As I sit, canary in a cage though I may be, and lavish in all the comforts that a 21st century existence allows a man of modest means, I can’t help but wonder, is there more? Something outside my prison of Television, Film, and animated games that flash their mind-numbing electric pulses into my retinas, down my optic nerves, and straight to the pleasure center of my shriveled mind, keeping me silent, and docile, and sated for the moment. Once, I knew the touch of other human beings. Once I heard voices, not pre recorded in Dolby 5.1 Digital Surround sound ™, but actual human voices made by human lungs blowing air over human vocal chords. Those times are lost, however. Now, there are only my electronic friends inside the box. David, Alexis, Johnny, Moira. They keep me company. They keep me safe. And this week they have a visit from a rich relative. I hope your prisons find you safe and healthy as well. Should this missive reach you, spare a thought for a fellow prisoner, wasting away, dreaming of open air, human interaction, and the Applebees 2 for $22 value menu featuring the Bourbon Street Chicken and Shrimp for a limited time only at your neighborhood Applebees. Theme by Sound of Days. https://media.blubrry.com/creekoftheweek/p/content.blubrry.com/creekoftheweek/COTW_240_SC_01x11.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe:...Episode 239 – Honeymoon
It’s a new week, and a new me! I went down a dark path with last week’s episode description, and I assure you that this week I am back to business as usual. So lets get to it! This week is about people going to parties! Ahem… So Johnny and Moira are feeling a little socially stifled (CANT RELATE TO THAT HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) and decide to shoehorn their way into a party invite (PARTY LOOKS DUMB AND NOT AT ALL FUN ANYWAY) where they engage in some casual drinking & recreational drug use. David, having just boinked the help, is invited by his sister Alexis to attend a dinner party in which 6 people gather (CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING IN A ROOM WITH 6 OTHER PEOPLE?!) It is awkward, and they all bring up awkward stuff and act awkward. So that’s it, it’s an episode strictly, about people gathering socially and indulging in the great privilege of being in proximity to other human beings. So that’s great! This is all fine. I’m fine. How are you? Good! Goodgoodgoodgoodgood. See ya next week, friends! Theme by Sound of Days https://media.blubrry.com/creekoftheweek/p/content.blubrry.com/creekoftheweek/COTW_239_SC_01x10.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe:...Episode 238 – Carl’s Funeral
Hello fellow quarantinians and welcome to the apocalypse. We, your humble hosts, are here to provide a bit of levity during these strange and frightening times, and to harken back to a world where the ever present threat of a slow and painful death, drowning in your own lung-fluid, was merely a remote possibility, and not the looming reality, the inevitable doom awaiting not only us, but those dearest to us. A dark new world in which our leaders barter with the lives of the most weary among us to keep the gears of the great machine greased with blood & souls. For you see the beast must be fed, and all of us are but kibble in the dish of the great capitalist dog-god, its frothy maw seeking only to devour… to consume… and to shit out the worthless stinking piles of refuse that will be those of us that are left behind once this great cataclysm has passed. So please, download! Listen! And for 38 minutes and 25 seconds attempt to forget that you live on a dying planet, in a crumbling society that sees only as much value in your existence as that which you are able to produce for the soulless and hungering class of obscenely wealthy ghouls that would sooner piss down your grandmother’s throat than grant her the lifesaving ventilator that would allow her to draw one more breath of the poisoned air that hangs about us all, thickening our lungs, baking the clay beneath our feet, boiling the seas to salt until nothing is left but skulls and stones. And of course...Episode 237 – Allez-Vous
We got a doozy this week folks. MLM fever hit’s Schitt’s Creek, and unfortunately the Rose’s are the last ones to catch it. While Moira is attempting to supplement her income with questionable cosmetics, Johnny is trying to get the unemployment that is his right as a taxpaying citizen. Alexis, of course, is flirting with Mutt and fighting with Ted. After the show we break every rule of podcasting. A few highlights include: Bad editing cuts, terrible one-channel audio, and eating food live on air! If that doesn’t draw the listeners in like flies I don’t know what possibly could. Theme by Sound of Days. https://media.blubrry.com/creekoftheweek/p/content.blubrry.com/creekoftheweek/COTW_237_SC_01x08.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe:...Episode 236 – Turkey Shoot
Welcome to episode se7en of Schitt’s Creek, and episode 23six6 of Creek of the Week. This week’s ep is quite delightful even though it involves vicious animal death. David panic-volunteers to go on a turkey hunt with Stevie and some locals, this obviously leads to some fun discomfort. Alexis goes on a date with Ted the Vet in a thinly-veiled attempt to make Mutt jealous. And Moira gets a spa day and a new haircut. Sitcom stuff! Theme by Sound of Days. https://media.blubrry.com/creekoftheweek/p/content.blubrry.com/creekoftheweek/cotw_236_SC_01x07.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe:...
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